I love this video! I'm with you on the sobriety choice. 4 1/2 years here. "alone" is such a vast and complex topic. my mind wanders as i think of what i want to type. but, for me, "alone" can be a terrifying thought... but also the most peaceful. "alone" with just nature, the sounds, the smells, the breeze. and alone is that inner antenna that draws in the flutter of an idea that just happens to come from nowhere when I play the next chord together with the next chord, and without thinking hum notes that weave together or next to the voice of the instrument. When I focus on the vastness of the universe and ponder that power... that is "alone". but, in my reality, if I remember to remember... I'm never really "alone". i often forget for a time though.
I'm still catching up on some of these. So...I'm sending a belated congratulations, on your 34 years of sobriety!
As far as "alone accomplishments", I have a couple of things to contribute. I'm kind of a weird combination of an introvert who does extrovert things. I have a lot of friends, but I don't always know who to ask, to go on trips that I want to do. A lot of them are paired off, and I'm perpetually single. I love cruises, and one day I found out there is a cruise company for women. They have a big Solos program - you can go on the ship alone and hang out with all of the other solo travelers! I've made so many good friends and been on so many adventures that I never would have done before! I even got invited to Australia, by some of the Australians I met on an Alaska cruise!
My other big "alone" accomplishment was that I took a standup comedy class, just because I wanted to get more comfortable speaking in front of people. The class laughed at all of the jokes I told...so I ended up becoming a standup comic. However, my writing eventually dried up. I'm hoping that reading about your experiences will inspire me to start writing again.
Ever since I was a kid I wanted to be in a band. One summer my folks put me in a summer day camp were we did crafts and music and had perform a skit to a record. I ended playing air guitar for a country song. I drew some inspiration from you, I saw a Go Go's video (I think I was 10 or 11) and really knew nothing but I noticed hey, her guitar sounds different and only has 4 strings and it sounds cool. Fast forward a few years and I was in concert band playing baritone. After my family moved I only stayed on another year as I was a few years behind the other kids so I hung it up. It wasn't until nearly 4 decades later I picked up the bass and immersed myself in it, joining my church band after practicing enough not to suck, then battling cancer. I went on hiatus for 4 months following surgery and I was back on stage. That part I couldn't have done without my wife, family and my bandmates! Your lines are pretty challenging! I was wondering: in the Head Over Heels video is that a Thunderbird you are playing, and do you still have it?
Hi Chad, I was going through some old notifications and saw that I'd missed this comment! So sorry. In HOH, I am playing a custom made bass using a Thunderbird for inspiration. Sadly, I think I sold it a long time ago and it makes me really sad. maybe to a Hard Rock cafe. Thank you for sharing your great story of coming to bass, and all you've gone through!
In 2020, I was 53 and I lived in the heart of Seattle. It was during the uncertainty of the pandemic and amidst the civil protests happening outside my door, that I decided to move to the calm life and get into the sun.
I headed to Palm Springs- where I had only visited maybe twice and knew of maybe 2 acquaintances there. I had my sights on LA for quite a while, but with the pandemic, I couldn’t imagine being in another city.
The sun and desert have made me less stressed and less depressed in many ways. And as I read your post - alone with my cat and dog nestled beside me, I am reminded of that yearning to get out. It might be that feeling you might be having. It is motivating. And although I don’t regret my move, I do realize I am still dealing with all the same issues - just in a new environment. Although I am in touch with all my good friends, it is odd making new friends at this stage. It has been an adventure for sure.
Anyway, good luck Kathy! And thank you for your writings. Your book was actually a great distraction when I was still dealing with the shock of uprooting myself after 23 years of being in Seattle.
Hi Gina, thank you so much for this! I really liked reading about your shifting cities and how it has been. I think in an earlier I wrote about making friends at later stages of life too, and relate to it being odd. To be this age and not have a history with someone, and yet to have SO much history to each party puts a whole different aspect to the deal.
Speaking of "alone" adventures, one of my best was going to Egypt by myself in the early or mid-90's...a little unsure of the year now. I'll have to figure that out because it is worth mentioning in my memoir follow up. That was also the first time I wrote for public consumption, a travelogue!
My alone accomplishment: In July 2021 I created my own art exhibition. I asked a friend if I could use their space, I put up flyers around the town, I invited everyone. It was the best thing I've ever done. I've confirmed three more exhibitions (so far) as a result. If I had waited for the gatekeepers to let me in so that I could fulfill my vision, I might still be waiting!
Throughout different periods of my life I've been alone or felt alone, at times not knowing which was worse. I was dealing with major changes since I was 21, losing my mother and other friends and family members over the years, there's something about losing someone like your mother and even though you're surrounded by people you feel empty and alone. Throughout the years when I felt this way I haven't always done it in the most healthy way, going on 14 years sober here. I struggle at times to find a creative Outlet, now doing semi-creative mixes on my computer of songs that at least sound cool to me. By semi-creative I mean I'm just downplaying what I do I always feel like if I sing my praises too much I'm being arrogant. But much like my mother, I inherited her musical Talent and have basically been self taught on piano and keyboards, and then later drums, with the Go-Go's being a profound influence and still are. That applies to when you ladies are working together or separately
It’s now 1 day after my Mom’s 91st birthday and while I’m happy she’s no longer ”suffering the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune” (aka her health and her heartbreaks in her life) I miss the nuances of the simple birthday dinner at the Chinese restaurant and dessert afterwards.
So, “alone” in a new place to commemorate a special person no longer here was to get 3 gourmet cupcakes, give the dog half of one, post a couple of photos, get a bus ride to a nature spot, smile and go back “home” and find a song that reminds me of Mom. (The day was cool, but I am certain tears will come later under cover of darkness.)
When I came to this new place, I basically had to leave all sorts of stuff in a storage facility. (I inherited thousands of dollars in blown glass ornaments that sadly sat this Christmas because I am still awaiting funds I know are coming but are delayed) I still don’t have tables, living room furniture but I at least have a dog, a bed, pc, hdtv, a cool soundbar and a subwoofer. (As long as I have music, I’ll survive… I won’t go insane!
Keep writing songs… some of us need it for our therapeutic properties!
Also, thanks Kathy on the well wishes healthwise. Awaiting X-rays on ankle and physical therapy. (Pfft we Gen X’ers… we think 55+ is the new 30 and then we get injured and start bitching about how we suddenly got too old and EVERYTHING hurts!)
Ooh, I'll share an alone-ish accomplishment, although I don't know how inspiring it will be.
When I wrote (with my co-author) my first novel, I couldn't find a publisher no matter what. We even had an agent for awhile, until she dumped us...by EMAIL. Harsh, right? And we'd been basically working for that agent for about half a year, making all sorts of changes that involved re-writing about 20% of the manuscript. It was a terrible, ego-smashing experience, after which getting dumped felt mostly like a relief.
Anyway, once the initial we've-lost-our-agent feeling passed, I said, "Wait a second...the novel she was making us write sucked. There's no way our original manuscript was worse than this, so let's go back to it--and self-publish it. We can do just as terrible a job as our agent did, right?" So we did., and then I marketed the hell out of that little book for years. I pitched every book blog in the free world (some of those bloggers have real reach), got famous people to read and endorse us (Arthur Chu!), and even did the drive-around-to-bookshops-with-box-of-books thing. It was grinding work, but it was a lot better than changing our art into something that wasn't us.
It took a few years, but eventually a small press got wind of our book and offered us a deal, which we happily accepted. A small press indeed--maybe sixty titles--but the publisher didn't make us change a word. I can't say we sold tons of copies, but what we sold was our actual work, and not some faked-up bullshit that an agent thought was marketable. I'm comfortable with the way it turned out.
I don't know the moral of that story, except that getting a book deal is a LOT less work than proofreading, typesetting, and commissioning art for your own novel.
I think your story is great Neil, and i relate to wanting to do it your way and being fine with doing all the work! Great job on following through with what you wanted. xxk
Thank you continuing to share your personal journey and your creative process. Good luck with your London move! It sounds like an amazing and very creative place.
I love watching the construction of a song. Thanks for sharing, Kathy! I’m a recent follower to your blog but long time fan of your work with the Go-Gos ❤️
So all us artists feel this? I wish I’d realized I was actually good at what I do earlier..
“ My most significant growth as a songwriter happened when I came to believe I was actually good at it and could trust my judgment. For years I suspected I was just very lucky (I am that as well.) I was well into my 30’s before I internalized/accepted/came to know I had talent. “
Hi Catherine, right? I recently said to Audrey: you already all the things you wish to be. Of course i don't mean in accomplishments, career, growth and across the board. just innately. hope to see you soon!! xxxk
I love this video! I'm with you on the sobriety choice. 4 1/2 years here. "alone" is such a vast and complex topic. my mind wanders as i think of what i want to type. but, for me, "alone" can be a terrifying thought... but also the most peaceful. "alone" with just nature, the sounds, the smells, the breeze. and alone is that inner antenna that draws in the flutter of an idea that just happens to come from nowhere when I play the next chord together with the next chord, and without thinking hum notes that weave together or next to the voice of the instrument. When I focus on the vastness of the universe and ponder that power... that is "alone". but, in my reality, if I remember to remember... I'm never really "alone". i often forget for a time though.
I'm still catching up on some of these. So...I'm sending a belated congratulations, on your 34 years of sobriety!
As far as "alone accomplishments", I have a couple of things to contribute. I'm kind of a weird combination of an introvert who does extrovert things. I have a lot of friends, but I don't always know who to ask, to go on trips that I want to do. A lot of them are paired off, and I'm perpetually single. I love cruises, and one day I found out there is a cruise company for women. They have a big Solos program - you can go on the ship alone and hang out with all of the other solo travelers! I've made so many good friends and been on so many adventures that I never would have done before! I even got invited to Australia, by some of the Australians I met on an Alaska cruise!
My other big "alone" accomplishment was that I took a standup comedy class, just because I wanted to get more comfortable speaking in front of people. The class laughed at all of the jokes I told...so I ended up becoming a standup comic. However, my writing eventually dried up. I'm hoping that reading about your experiences will inspire me to start writing again.
Joyce!! You are inspiring me!!
😊
Yellow is the same birth stone as scorpio. I guess that's why I rush through Yellow lights
I see yellow and I go faster for some reason.
I always go to work and hate hate catching the yellow lights. It's like someone is in the way every time
Ever since I was a kid I wanted to be in a band. One summer my folks put me in a summer day camp were we did crafts and music and had perform a skit to a record. I ended playing air guitar for a country song. I drew some inspiration from you, I saw a Go Go's video (I think I was 10 or 11) and really knew nothing but I noticed hey, her guitar sounds different and only has 4 strings and it sounds cool. Fast forward a few years and I was in concert band playing baritone. After my family moved I only stayed on another year as I was a few years behind the other kids so I hung it up. It wasn't until nearly 4 decades later I picked up the bass and immersed myself in it, joining my church band after practicing enough not to suck, then battling cancer. I went on hiatus for 4 months following surgery and I was back on stage. That part I couldn't have done without my wife, family and my bandmates! Your lines are pretty challenging! I was wondering: in the Head Over Heels video is that a Thunderbird you are playing, and do you still have it?
Hi Chad, I was going through some old notifications and saw that I'd missed this comment! So sorry. In HOH, I am playing a custom made bass using a Thunderbird for inspiration. Sadly, I think I sold it a long time ago and it makes me really sad. maybe to a Hard Rock cafe. Thank you for sharing your great story of coming to bass, and all you've gone through!
In 2020, I was 53 and I lived in the heart of Seattle. It was during the uncertainty of the pandemic and amidst the civil protests happening outside my door, that I decided to move to the calm life and get into the sun.
I headed to Palm Springs- where I had only visited maybe twice and knew of maybe 2 acquaintances there. I had my sights on LA for quite a while, but with the pandemic, I couldn’t imagine being in another city.
The sun and desert have made me less stressed and less depressed in many ways. And as I read your post - alone with my cat and dog nestled beside me, I am reminded of that yearning to get out. It might be that feeling you might be having. It is motivating. And although I don’t regret my move, I do realize I am still dealing with all the same issues - just in a new environment. Although I am in touch with all my good friends, it is odd making new friends at this stage. It has been an adventure for sure.
Anyway, good luck Kathy! And thank you for your writings. Your book was actually a great distraction when I was still dealing with the shock of uprooting myself after 23 years of being in Seattle.
Hi Gina, thank you so much for this! I really liked reading about your shifting cities and how it has been. I think in an earlier I wrote about making friends at later stages of life too, and relate to it being odd. To be this age and not have a history with someone, and yet to have SO much history to each party puts a whole different aspect to the deal.
Hurry to slow down and take it all in.
Speaking of "alone" adventures, one of my best was going to Egypt by myself in the early or mid-90's...a little unsure of the year now. I'll have to figure that out because it is worth mentioning in my memoir follow up. That was also the first time I wrote for public consumption, a travelogue!
My alone accomplishment: In July 2021 I created my own art exhibition. I asked a friend if I could use their space, I put up flyers around the town, I invited everyone. It was the best thing I've ever done. I've confirmed three more exhibitions (so far) as a result. If I had waited for the gatekeepers to let me in so that I could fulfill my vision, I might still be waiting!
Krissy I'm so glad you did it and opened the gates yourself!! What I saw was amazing and can't wait to see the full on experience. xx
Throughout different periods of my life I've been alone or felt alone, at times not knowing which was worse. I was dealing with major changes since I was 21, losing my mother and other friends and family members over the years, there's something about losing someone like your mother and even though you're surrounded by people you feel empty and alone. Throughout the years when I felt this way I haven't always done it in the most healthy way, going on 14 years sober here. I struggle at times to find a creative Outlet, now doing semi-creative mixes on my computer of songs that at least sound cool to me. By semi-creative I mean I'm just downplaying what I do I always feel like if I sing my praises too much I'm being arrogant. But much like my mother, I inherited her musical Talent and have basically been self taught on piano and keyboards, and then later drums, with the Go-Go's being a profound influence and still are. That applies to when you ladies are working together or separately
Cool Heather--and I agree, there's no "semi" creative to what you are making that pleases you!
congrats on your years of sobriety, glad to trudge the road xxK
Thanks 😊 and congrats on your many years of sobriety, that along with your other accomplishments is most impressive xxH
Hi there! Happy 64!!
It’s now 1 day after my Mom’s 91st birthday and while I’m happy she’s no longer ”suffering the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune” (aka her health and her heartbreaks in her life) I miss the nuances of the simple birthday dinner at the Chinese restaurant and dessert afterwards.
So, “alone” in a new place to commemorate a special person no longer here was to get 3 gourmet cupcakes, give the dog half of one, post a couple of photos, get a bus ride to a nature spot, smile and go back “home” and find a song that reminds me of Mom. (The day was cool, but I am certain tears will come later under cover of darkness.)
When I came to this new place, I basically had to leave all sorts of stuff in a storage facility. (I inherited thousands of dollars in blown glass ornaments that sadly sat this Christmas because I am still awaiting funds I know are coming but are delayed) I still don’t have tables, living room furniture but I at least have a dog, a bed, pc, hdtv, a cool soundbar and a subwoofer. (As long as I have music, I’ll survive… I won’t go insane!
Keep writing songs… some of us need it for our therapeutic properties!
Also, thanks Kathy on the well wishes healthwise. Awaiting X-rays on ankle and physical therapy. (Pfft we Gen X’ers… we think 55+ is the new 30 and then we get injured and start bitching about how we suddenly got too old and EVERYTHING hurts!)
~~ Susan
what a lovely way to celebrate your mom's birthday Susan! xxK
Ooh, I'll share an alone-ish accomplishment, although I don't know how inspiring it will be.
When I wrote (with my co-author) my first novel, I couldn't find a publisher no matter what. We even had an agent for awhile, until she dumped us...by EMAIL. Harsh, right? And we'd been basically working for that agent for about half a year, making all sorts of changes that involved re-writing about 20% of the manuscript. It was a terrible, ego-smashing experience, after which getting dumped felt mostly like a relief.
Anyway, once the initial we've-lost-our-agent feeling passed, I said, "Wait a second...the novel she was making us write sucked. There's no way our original manuscript was worse than this, so let's go back to it--and self-publish it. We can do just as terrible a job as our agent did, right?" So we did., and then I marketed the hell out of that little book for years. I pitched every book blog in the free world (some of those bloggers have real reach), got famous people to read and endorse us (Arthur Chu!), and even did the drive-around-to-bookshops-with-box-of-books thing. It was grinding work, but it was a lot better than changing our art into something that wasn't us.
It took a few years, but eventually a small press got wind of our book and offered us a deal, which we happily accepted. A small press indeed--maybe sixty titles--but the publisher didn't make us change a word. I can't say we sold tons of copies, but what we sold was our actual work, and not some faked-up bullshit that an agent thought was marketable. I'm comfortable with the way it turned out.
I don't know the moral of that story, except that getting a book deal is a LOT less work than proofreading, typesetting, and commissioning art for your own novel.
I think your story is great Neil, and i relate to wanting to do it your way and being fine with doing all the work! Great job on following through with what you wanted. xxk
Thank you continuing to share your personal journey and your creative process. Good luck with your London move! It sounds like an amazing and very creative place.
thank you! It's a lot of work so far, I'm not near ready but don't plan on doing it until end of summer.
I love watching the construction of a song. Thanks for sharing, Kathy! I’m a recent follower to your blog but long time fan of your work with the Go-Gos ❤️
Welcome Elaine, I'm glad to have you here!
So all us artists feel this? I wish I’d realized I was actually good at what I do earlier..
“ My most significant growth as a songwriter happened when I came to believe I was actually good at it and could trust my judgment. For years I suspected I was just very lucky (I am that as well.) I was well into my 30’s before I internalized/accepted/came to know I had talent. “
Hi Catherine, right? I recently said to Audrey: you already all the things you wish to be. Of course i don't mean in accomplishments, career, growth and across the board. just innately. hope to see you soon!! xxxk